The day after Boxing Day I got sick. It kind of crept up and then hit me like a ton of bricks. I became lethargic and congested, with a nasty cough to boot. Good times.

In truth though, it was actually kind of good. I was forced to do very little. I napped. I drank a lot of tea. I discovered that hot toddies might be my favourite medication. I worked on a puzzle, strummed on a ukelele and ate leftovers. Not that I would ever wish my child to be sick, but she got it too which meant she was content to be cozy.

Then all of a sudden it was January and time to get back to work. I’m usually ready to return to routine, this time not so much. I found myself getting anxious about everything I have to do and wishing that I could just stay curled up under a blanket. I felt unnerved.

So today as I made my way to the drop-in I kept thinking, how am I going to do this? How am I going to keep up with the pace? When are people going to realize I have no idea what I’m doing? Ouch.

When I arrived I was greeted by two friends from the street who helped me unload the car. I was handed a belated Christmas gift from a woman struggling with much: she crafted me a bird out of clay. So beautiful. Person after person talked about how much they missed PNC when we closed for the holidays. A new person to the community helped with dishes (that got done in record time) and then poured out his heart to me. As I looked at this big guy drying his tear-filled eyes, listening to how he wants to “get his life sorted out. There’s no such thing as a completely fresh start, but I want something like it”, I thought: I’m glad I didn’t stay under the blanket.

I needed to be reminded of the gift my work is to me. In the process I was told I mattered to it. It is a safe place to come no matter how I’m feeling.

I am so thankful and also kind of beat. Hot toddies here I come.

One thought on “Hot Toddies and Good Reminders

  1. hi erinn, again, this post shows that love and presence are what heals. it isn’t about us being good enough or skilled enough. just showing up and loving on people… that’s what people need. keep going! love sue

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